Stranger in the rain.

I’m dancing in the rain with a stranger.
He has no hands but his touch makes me shiver.
His beautiful smile,
Shines upon my face like the summer sun.
His sweat is drenching,
It draws me in
I don’t want to let go.
This man behind the rains,
He makes me wonder.
I want to know him more,
I want to go deeper.
Maybe someday, I’ll see him
When he won’t have to hide behind the rains to tell me he loves me.
When he doesn’t feed me with herbs and animal flesh.
When his loyalty will be revealed like it is,
Not through friendships with dogs and pets.
Maybe someday I’ll dance face to face
With the stranger in the rain.

~Philip N.A Larkai.

Advertisements

Keep breathing

So each day, make efforts to accomplish little things.

Life can be overwhelming when it is viewed as one big chunk.

Targets seem unattainable, deadlines cannot be met on time and all the goals set seem to be too far from reach.

But relax in the course of all that and find inspiration in the fact that you’re breathing. Your heart is beating just fine and you still have a brain and a mouth.

Stop for a while,take a deep breath and say a prayer- or anything that reminds you that you’re not alone.

And get back to life. Life is beautiful. Live it like that.

The Power Of Vulnerability

Everyone gets the feeling of inadequacy and self doubt every now and then. This may not directly be an indication of vulnerability but puts us in discomfort all the same. 

Personally,I’ve come to perceive the world as a place where only the fittest survive – natural selection has been carved into a truth no one ever dares to overlook. Feeling vulnerable is intolerable, almost abhorred by the very society that inadvertently imprints the feeling of vulnerability on the victims it creates. 

Society forbids us to be weak. We are supposed to always pick ourselves up and “feel okay” at all cost ~ Anonymous 

But being vulnerable and prone is human. The feeling of being on the line reminds us of how much we stand to lose. It may not build us a safe haven but the tendency of losing the things we cherish awakens seemingly dormant sentiments of having to do more. For me, the feeling of vulnerability shakes off “fantasies”. It elucidates the reality that life is not going to hand everything over to me on a silver platter because I simply want to have something. In a nutshell, it makes me want to want what I want badly enough to not want to lose it. The risk of losing something dear to me, and that feeling of vulnerability is what I’ve come to realize is the ideal motivation for achievement. 

Vulnerability elicits a response strong enough to prevent repetition of mistakes made in the past ….

And even more. “Okwonkwo”, the protagonist in Chinua Achebe’s “things fall apart”  in my opinion didn’t want to live his life in the shadow of his father’s. His father was a disappointment and he didn’t want any association whatsoever with him. The likelihood of having to end up like his father fueled his rise to prominence. It was the feeling of being prone to failure that in my opinion shot him to stardom. 

Most of us lack the motivation to continue living. Or for some, being more and demanding more from life is something beyond our reach. We can’t seem to want more because we are okay where we are. “Things are better than they used to be.” Appreciating progress is good, but it should be a recipe for higher achivements. The feeling of being in control of our lives at certain points may fortify complacency, which eventually leads to depreciation of whatever we thought we had enough of.

“Owning our story can be hard but not nearly as difficult as spending our lives running from it. Embracing our vulnerabilities is risky but not nearly as dangerous as giving up on love and belonging and joy—the experiences that make us the most vulnerable. Only when we are brave enough to explore the darkness will we discover the infinite power of our light.”~  Brene Brown. 

Maybe society got it all wrong, maybe feeling weak and insecure and vulnerable isn’t a shame after all. Maybe for some of us, feeling vulnerable sometimes is the missing spicy ingredient to take the melancholy out of our plateauing lives. I’m therefore quick to admit that the feeling of being on edge is only a condition. It is our reaction that determines whether we are half as strong as we think we are. 

Philip N. A Larkai. 

Woes of a Wanderer 

I can’t love everyone the same, 
I’m only human. 

I live, love, forget, laugh, cry and sometimes get filled with disdain 

I live in the moment, only a few days and I’m gone. 

I sense opportunities and I take them. Like everyone else I’m selfish. 

I want to be happy so I go where I find happiness. Only to be told in the face I’m wicked and inconsiderate. 

What should I do then? 

Am I wrong to be human? Or should I play the cards of immortals? 

My clearest and candid opinions should be held back. Because they please nobody else apart from myself. 

I can’t hate, so I live freely……reaping repercussions greater  than what I bargained for. 

Life’s complexity makes me call for a mayday . Where could I go but to the Lord? 

I’m told to be wise. Does wisdom have its excesses then? 

Then I’m told not to please anyone. I became self- centered in my attempt.

 The same people who advised me are the same people now painting me black. 

I’ve tried. 

I’m trying to live right. Looking out for myself is all I ever did wrong. 

I have no regrets. Standing for what I believe in brought me this far. 

I believe in God and I believe in myself. 

I’m human but I want to be more. I want a taste of divinity and a foretaste of eternity.

I acknowledge that I’ll die oneday, 

And the good and bad I premeditated will be replayed on the day of reckoning

But until then I’ll strive for satisfaction,rising above odds and doing my master’s will.

I found a muse in my confusion. I’ve learned more than life could teach me. 

My days are young and the night is nearer than I could ever imagine. 

There’s no one else in my likeness so I have more reason to acknowledge my Creator

Till the story ends…………, 

 Uncertainties beckon.

 Philip N. A Larkai. 
                                 

 

Fathers are humans too!  Give them a break. 

Fathers’ Day came fast! – well at least for me but it couldn’t be ordinary. I hadn’t planned to take my dad on a cruise liner in the Carribean or do anything grand. Well maybe my imaginary mind could afford to but reality spoke louder and it was deafening, truth is I’m broke! 

Being the smartass I aim to be, I decided to do the wordplay and put together a nice speech; One I thought would make him blush and feel good but it didn’t go exactly as I planned ( mainly because my home, like most typical Ghanaian homes is at least spared the ’emotional sentiments’ between father and son). In corollary I just stuck to the conventional “happy fathers’ day and may God bless you” wish. 

Later in the day after church, it was actually still before noon since I attended my preferable first service, I was drawn to the thought of the joy of having a responsible father in the little over 20 years of my life and what it should mean to me. It was a privilege only  a few people could enjoy yet those of us lucky enough to have experienced it treat it like a thing we’re entitled to- at all cost!  

Would I point a gun at God if I didn’t have a father when I was growing up?  Would I blame nature if all I got was a drunk, irresponsible father whose whole life savings ended up in ‘Daavi’s pocket’ and generated huge interest returns that only his deteriorating liver could testify to? Who was I anyway to judge the man whose only achievements in life was to make my dreams and those of my siblings come true? (He hasn’t done bad at all, he has two accountants, a nurse and an aspiring doctor now entering his third year to show for his struggles for a man who barely holds a university degree). 

Daavi is a word meaning ‘madam’ or ‘mother’ in the Ghanaian setting and of Ewe origin (people from the Volta Region of Ghana). 

The more I thought of this, the more undeserving of him I became. My dad is not a perfect man, but God gave me the best person for a dad! He isn’t flawless, if he were, what sense would my mistakes make to him? He’ll die someday (how I dread the thought of it?) but that’ll only teach me to number my days and live righteously. But for now, while I still have you, You’re my hero paps! 

Emmanuel Nii Adama Larkai! (In black coat). This remains my favorite picture of him. 

A Guide To A Fulfilled Life

image

Life as we may have it is a long road of tests and trials intertwined with short moments of happiness and jolly which are mostly shortlived. Most people ,if not  every one of us are constantly seeking to remain in happiness for as long as our short lives would allow us but the question is how many of us actually make a life of that nature?

I’m only a little above nineteen, I may not have lived for a century but I’ve lived long enough to see seasonal changes and how wealthy, filthy-rich and powerful men have died and had been buried in the same manner as men whose lives weren’t worth a penny. I’ve lived to recognize and acknowledge the fact that life makes more sense without the excesses of mundane things of this world – money, cars, mansions and that happiness is found in little which we usually overlook. Happiness in itself is a feeling and we can only truly be happy if we set our feelings and emotions straight irrespective of the demands of circumstances surrounding us. I cannot tell you how to be happy all the time but I can make you realize that happiness is a decision and it starts by you altering your viewpoint of this world a little and trying more less boring stuff.

Count each day as one of your blessings and you’ll be surprised the outcome. Have we ever imagined ourselves receiving series of good news in a day?  How it will feel to not get disappointed by the turn of events each day as we go about our work and endeavours? Perhaps these thoughts and imaginations never crossed our minds because we feel we’re entitled to everything we desire in life. Meanwhile we are wrong, truth being we simply don’t deserve some of the good things in life that we already have and those we are yearning for.  I’m not saying our lives should be of low standards, no not all but we could go through life with lower expectations so we’re less disappointed each time our plans and expectations don’t happen.

Your life should be centered on being of value, not successful..   Be a person of value to the world around you, be the  one element people can’t do without because that way you serve more people. That is not to say success is bad  but focusing on your success alone in the wake of society’s needs makes you less of a commodity of value. Unless your success becomes instrumental to the growth of your world, you only became successful to yourself.

And how about making the best out of life’s numerous opportunitiesYou might have heard this ‘crap’ more times than you’ve heard your name but I’ll add up to it a little if not completely change your viewpoint. Failures aren’t failures if they put us back on track on our road to the self fulfillment we so much yearn for. Failures come after recognizing that you didn’t pay enough attention to the opportunities that could have changed situations. The  “what ifs” are the starting points of failures. Questioning our actions is a good thing but when it begins to cripple our dreams and gives us a blurry picture of the opportunity we are supposed to be grabbing,  then it’s fear. Sometimes we act before we think simply because that’s the best option we felt we had at that point in time. For some reasons these to a large extent turn out to be the best things we ever did in our lives. That’s intuition, trust it a little more if you want to scavenge on opportunities.

These aren’t all I can say now but I wrote this based on my mood and the “little revelation” I may have received. 

Dear Devil,

I’m sorry to announce that you’ve continuously proven to be irrelevant in my life and that it’s time to leave. Maybe it has taken me longer to put you in the known than I’ve thought about this but your oustering is it’s eventuality.

I’m sure you saw this coming when I met this one gentleman who opened my eyes to the difference between joy and pleasure. The need to truly love and not coil my mind and soul in lust. He taught me what satisfaction without mundane addictions and obsessions was and held my hand through the ring of fire you were gradually circumventing my life with. Despicable you!

It didn’t take me long to notice because I was just blindfolded but hadn’t lost my sight. Though I hadn’t seen this indispensable gentleman I could feel him. His absence which I created, was the only reason you hung around longer than you should have.

But he’s here now in my inner man ,the only place you couldn’t capture.How could you have been so myopic and predictable for that matter, that your plans didn’t go any further than capturing my flesh.He told me, that one gentleman you so much dread, that I fear not those whose goal is my flesh to hurt but to give reference to king to whom I owe my soul.

Scores settled now. You had your time, short as it was the harm was very much felt. But between us two stands that one man now, go past him and I’m your crown.Don’t lose your head just yet, focus on the bigger whippings that await you. That was an advice anyway and I urge you to be wise.

Goodbye to you isn’t hard to say because I’m soft enough to accept my mistakes and say hello to my redeemer. He needs no intro but meet him anyways just in case you have a change of mind.His name is JESUS.
           

What Is Life??

image

What is life??
If there are no battles to be won so crowns could be worn,
If there are no tears to be shed so cares could be shared,
If lies do not reign so the truth would clear the pain,
If no hearts get broken, so one could love again.

What is life??
When our dreams and works in the pipeline go  down the drain,
And see no sunshine until the clouds above our heads bring forth rain,
This,  King Solomon and the men of old have called insane,
Life’s cold, warmth is the same.

What is life??
If in the end the rich and poor share the same home,
Young and old live for eternity,
The bright and melancholic with light will roam,
The lonely and friendly meet the divine trinity.

It is unclear what life will be without life itself,
But I know no other mysteries above  life’s uncertainties,
They don’t come alone, some with joy,  others with misery,
But to cut it all short , PRAYER IS THE KEY!!            

                                       #Pinch

A Message From The Grave

It all comes down to this,
After the eulogies and dirges,elegies and biographies
The one place I never thought I would be,
The land of the desolate  life under the land.

Once I was there too,
The land you own and the cloths you owe,
The very sweat of your skin and the weeping soul under your  skin.
I played the fool, and I was dead too soon.

Now I lie alone,
A box below the very land I reigned on
Beaten by rain and pissed to the bone
At least I now know, I was so wrong.

Wreath upon wreath they lay,
From the fake and genuine alike
They go ahead anyway
Poor me!  They are all ones I dislike.

But one thing remains,
There’s no starting afresh.
Teeth keep gnashing and grinning,
Till insects mercilessly do away with my remains.

#PINCH

Who You Are

You haven’t made much of a difference if you live life just like everybody else.What you’ll be remembered for after your life has ended is the impact your life made on another’s life.You may not be the wisest, strongest, funniest person in the world but you are the only kind of you there is in the whole world.You may be depriving someone of experiencing what real joy and accomplishment means if you selfishly keep denying people of the wonderful and unique person you are.Remember both your weaknesses and strengths add up to make the person you are.One without the other just isn’t possible. Otherwise which would you measure one against  and how would you know how well you are doing on the scale of life.Great people have turned much of their weaknesses if not all to what they are really good at not with the aim of pleasing others but to make an impact.One last thing, be yourself AlWAYS.Some people love you just the way you are.Others hate how peculiar you are but they love the variety you introduce; which they ofcourse do not know.